I’m A New Grandma. Here's How I Really Feel About It

Most of my friends don't have grandchildren yet.

By
Published January 24, 2025
gif illustration of grandmother with grandchild in different scenarios
Ana Curbelo

When my son and daughter-in-law shared the wonderfully exciting news that they were expecting, I couldn’t believe my ears. We’re going to be grandparents!

Later that night, my husband sweetly asked, “Hey, Grandma. Does that make you feel old?” The fact that we now fill the elder positions our grandparents once held slowly dawned on him.

“Not at all!” I blurted. I imagined myself energetically participating in grandma-and-me classes (something that never existed in my parenting generation), pushing our new, doughy grand-bundle around town in a snazzy stroller and teaching her to play fetch in the backyard with our goldendoodle. “We’re still young!”

Young-ish is more like it. I recently turned 60. Most of my friends don’t have grandchildren yet. “You’re a young grandma,” they tease, and I love it. I don’t feel grandma-y at all, though I’m not exactly sure what being a grandma is supposed to feel like. Search for “grandma” images online, and you’ll find soft, white-haired ladies with bifocals resting on their noses and fingers wrapped around knitting needles.

The grandmas I know today look nothing like mine, who had perfectly coiffed chin-length hair. They smelled of powder and mothballs and had false teeth in a glass by their bed. My mom cut her hair to the nape of her neck within weeks of impending grandma-hood. She was 54.

According to an AARP national survey, over half of “today’s grandparents consider themselves ‘cooler’ than their own grandparents.” I’m more active than my grandparents were. I am a freelance writer. I’m social. And I’m also developing a new skill set: learning to keep quiet. Because with each new generation, the parenting guidelines change. I remember my mother struggling to bite her tongue when I told her my approach to parenting small children.

Honestly, I’m thrilled not to have to create the rules; I can just abide by them. I was the rule enforcer for decades, and it was exhausting. My greatest pleasure is watching how beautifully and brilliantly my son and daughter-in-law have embraced parenthood. Now, it’s my turn to sit back and relax.

Staying young as we age also means keeping an open mind, learning new rules and listening to new directions. Unlike 30 years ago when I was a newly-minted mommy, infants now sleep on their back, their rooms are pitch-black with the help of blackout curtains, cribs are bumper- and blanket-free and feeding, napping and sleeping schedules are ironclad. I know being a grandparent is the frosting on the cake. It’s the parents who do the heavy lifting. Respecting new parents’ wishes helps them and the baby and ensures that we grandparents get oodles and oodles of cuddle and play time.

After decades of swimming and walking for exercise, I began a strength training program to prepare for my grandbaby’s arrival. Not only did I need to bolster my aging bones, but I also had to develop the power to hoist a baby into the air and keep up with a moving toddler. After each workout, I felt stronger, stood taller, and, yes, I felt younger. While sometimes my back gets a little sore after a day of babysitting, the thrill of spending time with my granddaughter buzzes through my body long after she’s back home in her cozy crib. The adage is true: kids keep you young!

Becoming a grandma is not without perks. I got to choose a new name for myself, which more than half of grandparents do today, rather than accept traditional grandma and grandpa monikers. I picked “Gigi,” which is youthful, loving, chic, feisty, fun and how I want my sweet grandbaby to see me. Achieving grandma status means not only reinventing myself in this new stage of life, but also reliving my kids’ baby years — a time when I was in my 20s and practically a baby myself. Opening boxes of baby items to possibly pass on to my grandchild brings back sweet memories and invigorates me. The sound of her coos is nothing short of nirvana.

Nothing compares to holding your baby’s baby. It’s everything a grandparent imagines and more. Even though I have now reached advanced levels of parenting, being around my grandbaby is like jet fuel for my soul. I feel better than ever.

How many of you are already grandparents? Do you feel younger than ever? Let us know in the comments below.

Linda Wolff is a freelance writer whose work has appeared in The Washington Post, The Los Angeles Times, Good Housekeeping, Cosmopolitan and more. She is also the voice behind Carpool Goddess, where she proves that midlife, motherhood and the empty nest aren’t so scary.