9 Things Every Woman Over 40 Should Get Rid Of

They had been weighing me down unnecessarily.

By

Kristina Wright

 
Published August 14, 2026
Colorful illustration of hands sweeping unused makeup, a coffee mug, papers, a pen, and miscellaneous household items into a trash bin
Emma Erickson

Sometime in my late 30s, I started noticing I was holding onto things that no longer fit my life. My subscription to Cosmopolitan, for instance, had followed me since high school. I kept renewing it out of loyalty to a younger version of myself who had once devoured every page. But somewhere along the way, it stopped feeling relevant to the life I was actually living.

The same was true in other ways. I had kitchen cabinets overflowing with things I never used, a closet full of clothes I was saving for events that never came, acquaintanceships that took too much effort to maintain, and a mental checklist of expectations and rules I no longer believed in. More and more, I found myself asking, “Why am I still carrying this?”

The truth is, sometimes we need to let go simply because something no longer fits who we are. Here are the things I’m learning to get rid of rather than letting them weigh me down.

1. Household Items That Have Outlived Their Usefulness

Earlier this year, I got rid of a pot I’d had since I got married. Somewhere along the way its lid disappeared — probably in one of our moves. I kept using it anyway, balancing a lid from another pot over the top, until I realized I was spending more effort accommodating the pot than it was worth. So much of midlife is noticing where we’ve been adjusting our lives around things that are no longer useful.

2. Relationships That Have Faded Naturally

Not every neighbor, coworker, or acquaintance is meant to become a lasting friend. At times, I’ve realized I wasn’t sustaining a real connection so much as holding onto the nostalgia of a particular season — moms from my kids’ schools, other military spouses, people I saw daily simply because life placed us in the same orbit. Real friends deserve our time and attention, but situational friendships can be appreciated for what they were, then released with grace so there’s room for the connections that meet us where we are now.

3. Clothes That Don’t Match Your Actual Life

For years I kept a pair of stiletto heels I wore once — to an event where I ended up with the worst blisters of my life. Those shoes stayed in my closet for over a decade until I finally gave them away. Since then, I’ve gotten better about letting go of uncomfortable shoes, out-of-style clothes, items that no longer fit, formal wear with nowhere to go, and seasonal pieces tied to long-ago plans. Clothing holds no real value if we can’t actually use it.

4. The Belief That It’s Too Late to Start Something New

When I went back to college to get my master’s degree in my late 30s, I felt out of place because I was often the oldest student in class. But I’m glad I didn’t listen to that voice telling me I didn’t belong there, because over time I realized I was exactly where I needed to be. We need to give up the idea that curiosity and novelty have an age limit. Learning something new in midlife can feel more meaningful because we’re finally ready to appreciate it.

5. Expired Makeup and Beauty Items

Sometime during the pandemic, I pared down my makeup collection and found an expensive lipstick I’d bought impulsively years earlier but had only worn a few times. I work from home and rarely wear makeup, but I was still tempted to keep it even though it had long since expired. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying makeup or experimenting with beauty trends, but expired products need to go. Feeling obligated to finish what we once bought on a whim isn’t worth the mental gymnastics of figuring out when we’ll use it, the space it takes up, or worse, an infection from a bacteria-laden product.

6. Unnecessary Guilt

At random times over the course of a day, I’ll find myself feeling bad about something I said … in 2002. I don’t know why I carry guilt over things no one else is thinking about anymore, but I do. And I know I’m not alone in dwelling on missed calls, delayed replies, things said in an argument, and decisions I’ve already learned from. But guilt that isn’t teaching us anything is just mental dead weight. I remind myself that letting it go doesn’t erase my responsibility, it simply stops turning the past into something I’m needlessly fretting about.

7. Paper You’re Keeping Out of Habit

So much of our lives are stored in paper we don’t actually need to keep. I’ve learned to throw out old tax documents, bills, stacks of school forms from when my kids were younger, and anything I already have a digital copy of or know I’ll never need. Now I file, scan, or photograph the things I really want to hold onto — like that recipe for mango margaritas I found in a travel magazine. Getting rid of the paperwork of a busy life is an ongoing process, but it’s worth it for the physical and mental space it creates when we’re no longer asking, “Now where did I put that?" when it comes to the things we actually need.

8. Traditions You No Longer Enjoy

I felt bad the first time I said to a friend, “Let’s not exchange gifts this year,” but she was just as relieved as I was to trade the stress for a leisurely lunch instead. There are traditions and rituals we continue simply because we always have — driving from house to house on Thanksgiving, or attending monthly book clubs when we’re the only one who reads the book. It’s okay to step back from something that no longer brings us joy and make room for something that does.

9. The Idea That Your Best Years Are Behind You

There’s a teenage version of me who thought I’d have everything figured out by now. She had a timeline, a set of expectations, and a very specific idea of what success would look like in midlife. She would probably be surprised by how much I’ve detoured from that plan. But those detours have often been the most meaningful parts of my life — and some of my best years still feel like they’re ahead. The gift of midlife is learning what actually matters now and letting the rest fall away so we can live more fully as ourselves.

What do you think of the above? What are you getting rid of? Let us know in the comments below.

Kristina Wright has written for a variety of publications, including Cosmopolitan, Good Housekeeping, Healthline, Narratively, Scary Mommy, USA Today, and the Washington Post. She is also a regular contributor at BookBub and writes a monthly column for the Washington Independent Review of Books. Kristina lives in the suburbs of Richmond, Virginia, with her husband, two teenage sons, two Goldendoodles, a ginger cat, a green conure, and a lot of books.