When I was younger, I loved being photographed. My mom has albums filled with me posing as a child, teen and young adult. In my 30s and early 40s, I was still okay being in a photo, especially alongside my three children, husband or friends.
But sometime in my 40s, I sensed a shift. I became self-conscious and started disliking how I looked in photos, often preferring to be behind the camera instead of in front of it.
The iPhone camera is partly to blame. It’s easier to take a picture (everyone has a camera in their pocket at all times) and the results are in real-time. I’ll look at it and immediately start disparaging my appearance. My inner critic becomes louder and louder with every passing year. It’s hard to resist the urge to press the “garbage can” icon and make the image disappear.
I find I am not alone. The comment I hear most after my peers see photos of themselves is, "I look terrible." Of course, they do not.
“Women tend to be critical of their appearance, especially as they age and not just in photos,” explains Melani Lust, a professional photographer from Connecticut. "In their minds, they often have a vision of how they look. Then they see themselves, and it doesn't match the vision they had in their heads."
Beyond being critical in general, many of us do ourselves a disservice. “Lens choice, harsh lighting, certain poses — all of this can contribute to accentuating perceived flaws,” says Lust. “The result is a ‘bad’ photo that makes a person feel bad about themselves.”
The good news is that there are things you can do to take a better pic.
Let There Be (Natural) Light
"Good lighting is key," says Lust. "High-contrast lighting makes you look older than you are. Recessed lighting is especially unforgiving. It enhances the contrast and creates shadows, emphasizing wrinkles, laugh lines and dark circles."